When Will We Stop Normalizing Child Abuse?

Almost a year ago, I wrote “Sacrificing Our Children on the Altar of Covid”. https://gershondistenfeld.blogspot.com/2020/09/sacrificing-our-children-on-altar-of.html

I knew already back then after speaking to various psychologists and educators that we were abusing our children, but refrained from calling it what is was on the advice of those who felt that I would lose my audience by doing so.

I now regret following that advice and I won’t make the same mistake this time. It’s clear that we as a society are abusing our children. And I’m going to use the term “abuse” continuously here because that’s what it is. Period. It’s not the physical kind and I’m not here to argue whether it’s more or less severe than any other form of abuse. But abuse is abuse. And treating our children in a way that stunts their psychological, emotional, social and educational development definitely qualifies.

And just like I would hope that any decent person wouldn’t stand idly by when they know that a child is being physically abused in their home, we dare not stay silent when we are systematically abusing our children in the public arena.

Which brings me to why I feel the need to write this piece today. To say I was horrified by the Covid 2021 policies put out by our local Yeshiva High Schools is a huge understatement. Not only are they willing to abuse our children indefinitely, they are proud to do so and brag about it. One even couched it in the message of Elul.

As an aside, I’m not going to address the issue of masking here even though it’s clear that too is a form of abuse. At least there the schools can hide behind the Governor’s mandate. Never mind that if the government tried to restrict our religious freedoms, the schools would certainly fight back and sue the state, but when they are willing to muzzle our children in the name of “science” and aggravate their emotional, psychological, educational and social growth, they just acquiesce, throw up their hands and say that there is nothing they can do.

What I’m going to address is much much worse. I’m referring to vaccine coercion via shaming and segregation of the unvaccinated. It’s reprehensible, anti-Torah and against basic human decency.

Therefore, I am appalled by the policies of segregation set forth by many of our local Yeshiva High Schools. Here is what our local girl’s Yeshiva High School sent out to parents last week (The boy’s Yeshiva High School has very similar language):

Students who are not vaccinated will be allowed to attend school in person. However, they will be required to comply with the following protocol. ANY student who does not comply with the protocol will not be permitted to return to school. 1) Non-vaccinated students will be required to submit a negative Covid-19 test result on a weekly basis. We will accept a negative PCR test result or a negative rapid test result. 2) Non-vaccinated students will not be permitted to participate in parts of our program which involve heavy activity or intensive close contact with others. This includes PE, Athletic teams, Performing Arts, and overnight aspects of our program. 3) Non-vaccinated students will be required to wear a medical grade disposable surgical mask while in the building.  4) Non-vaccinated students may eat only outdoors during the fall. We will also have designated indoor locations during the winter season or other inclement weather. 5) Non-vaccinated students will be required to abide by full quarantine regulations after travel to locations of increased risk, as well as after an exposure to a Covid-19 positive individual.

This is segregation in its most basic form. We are creating a caste system based on vaccination status which publicly shames children. 

We Jews should know better. Segregating our fellow human beings (especially children) based on any internal or external characteristics almost always leads to harm. Making any group into the “others” is the first step in rationalizing and eventually accepting even more severe forms of abuse. Jews have historically been segregated more than any other group in history and blamed for every plague or malady, even in the most “enlightened” societies. Separating one group from others gives license for even good people to commit heinous acts and then eventually blame the victims for their own subjugation. It may seem justified now, but we should know better.

It’s also important to note that all of this is for a disease that has almost no material impact on the children who get it. Just a few days ago, NASA released the probability that the asteroid Benny would strike the earth and eradicate mankind. They didn’t compare it to Covid but I will. It’s 123 times more likely to happen than the probability a child under 18 dies of Covid (0.058% vs 0.00047%).

This is science? What’s next - a scarlet letter on the unvaccinated? Maybe like in pre-war Germany, we can force some children to wear a special symbol to declare their dirty and filthy unvaccinated status! Come to think of it, that’s exactly what these schools are doing by forcibly identifying the unvaccinated; mandating that they wear a different kind of mask. I will repeat - when in history have the ones coercing and segregating been the good guys?

Not letting kids participate in school functions? Making them eat separately? These are Torah values? This makes us a “light unto the nations”???

Who is charged with making these policies? There is no distinction or consideration of those who have previously had Covid and have natural immunity. There is no tolerance for anyone who isn’t willing to inject their kids with a vaccine that brings minimal benefit and unknown risks. There is no transparent evaluation of the risk/reward and weighing the emotional, psychological, educational and social impact on our children. There is no respect for personal decisions. You either do as they say or they treat your child like an outcast!

To be clear, I’m not an anti-vaxxer. I believe that most adults should get the vaccine to protect themselves. But the risk/benefit analysis as it relates to adolescents is an entirely different story and nobody should dictate to parents what is in the medical best interests of their child.

Here are some of the things that a child is more likely to die from than Covid: Cancer (10x more likely), Car accident (9x), Suicide, (7.5x) Homicide (3.5x), Cardiovascular Disease (3x), Drowning (2.5x), Flu (2x). A healthy child is more likely to die from a lightning strike than from Covid. So by the same logic, we ought to do things like force all children to walk to school (lest they get into a car accident and die) and probably ban all outdoor activities because after all, they may get struck by lightning.

But even if the risks to contracting Covid and experiencing complications increase from here with new variants, there is simply no evaluation (maybe even no recognition) of the way we are hurting our children. A prominent doctor just told me today that it will likely be a decade or more before we understand the full impact of the immense trauma we are causing our kids. What will it take for people to wake up?

Where is our Rabbinical leadership? One whom I respect very much told me yesterday that “I agree with you but the schools didn’t ask us”. My response is simple. If the schools were feeding our kids non-Kosher food, would you try to intervene or would you say “ the school didn’t ask my opinion”? We all know the answer to that question. Al Achas Kama V’kama (all the more so), here where we are psychologically, emotionally, educationally and socially abusing our kids, that you MUST you speak up!

Where are everyday members of our community? How can you just stand idly by and let these schools abuse children? I don’t care if you vaccinated your child and are just breathing a sigh of relief that the schools at least aren’t making your kids wear helmets in case a meteor strikes them. How can you be silent when your friend’s kids are about to suffer like this???

Let me be clear. I don’t for a minute think that the people making these decisions are intentionally trying to hurt kids. Quite the opposite. But they have lost the forest from the trees and can’t see the impact that these polices are having on many children.

“Covid shaming” is now becoming a very serious form of public humiliation for children, many of whom don’t even know enough to make these decisions for themselves properly.

Additionally, intent is not really relevant when it comes to our children. If we are hurting them, then those who are responsible for it need to be called out even if they have best intentions.

Are these schools likely to recognize the severe error of their ways and reverse course? Unlikely. Human nature is such that most will not admit their mistakes. They will just find ways to justify their actions so they can sleep at night. So what do I hope to accomplish by writing this?

If even one person somewhere in the world reads this, comes to their senses and doesn’t publicly shame and abuse a child they otherwise would have, it was worth it to write this. Hopefully many others will speak up, there will be mass pressure to end this nonsense and we will thus save countless kids from the terrible abuse we are heaping upon them.

May G-d give our leadership the wisdom to see the errors of their ways and return to letting our children live normal lives without undue fear. Amen.

The author can be reached at gershon.distenfeld@gmail.com